Season two opens with a dictionary definition of the word 'dagger' as 'a genetically engineered life form manufactured in the early 21^st century', followed by a definition of the 'dark age of genetics': 'a period dating from 2001-2003 when genetically engineered human-like life forms were engineered solely for the purpose of waging war. Outlawed in 2004'.

Okay, that sets the scene for the season. We have entered a strange, new world.
The action begins. A very swish speedboat arrives at the G.E.L.F colony, otherwise known as 'Dagger Island'. Security is high and the prison guards talk about their charges in derogatory terms as we get our first glimpse of the 'Daggers', with their patchwork skin tone, coming out to exercise. Their silence and poise is a good contrast to the sneering of the guards. We get an impressive but overlong display of a very graceful exercise routine, to which the guards are supremely indifferent. Then the speeder arrives and we meet Lt. Jim Brody. His attitude to the daggers is more respectful, even as they hiss menacingly at him as he passes. His colleague suspects they are up to something and we get a bit of conversational exposition: the GELFs are celebrating their 21^st birthday the next day, but since their creation was outlawed they have been locked up. How do they all have the same birthday? How were they 'engineered' to have all been born on the same day? Did the geneticists use surrogates, or are we supposed to believe that they discovered some other way of creating life? I'm puzzled by this. Brody is far more sympathetic to them that his colleague.

Skip to New Cape Quest, Florida, and a motorbike zooms down the freeway … only to be pulled up and fined for speeding, and all done automatically. I'm very impressed by this system. Cursing, Bridger arrives at the dock to see the new seaQuest all ready to ship out. He sees Lucas having great fun hooning around the bay with a girl on a jetski. Hey, look at that – Lucas got a girl! Trying very obviously to impressve the girl, he tells her that he and seaQuest are about to sail up to New York to parade before the President. Then the newly bearded Bridger disturbs them and, amusingly, the girl plays up to the captain, much to Lucas' dismay. Lucas has acquired an earring, which Bridger subtly tells him to lose – even more amusingly, it is a clip-on.

Back at Dagger Island, we hear some of the Gelfs discussing insurrection, desiring their freedom. Mariah advocates a real fight, while Joseph refuses to fight because that was why they were made and he wants more, better. Then some others have a similar discussion, showing each Dagger choosing a side. A guard comes around, taunting male gelfs about not being 'real men' (since they are apparently designed to be infertile and thus unable to breed) and then sleazing onto Mariah, who has apparently been cultivating him – but then pulls a gun on him.

How did these imprisoned GELFs get guns? That's what you get for engineering the perfect soldiers – even top security is not secure enough. But already I am wondering just how long their training went on for. If they are 21, and their creation was outlawed in 2004 and they have been locked up since – they must have been children. Why, when and how were they given this military training? Because the bio-engineering is not enough for their level of skill, they had to have been trained as well.

On seaQuest a harassed Ford is directing the newly arrived enlisted crew to their quarters, telling them, "I'm only gonna go through this once." So of course, he is approached by a new crewwoman, Lonnie Ellen Henderson, who missed her name. Ford's frustration is sooo evident in his face, although he keeps his tone level. She is first generation navy and not up with the naval protocol. And she has brought a stuffed dog. You can see the despair in Ford's face. He confiscates the dog and dismisses her. Then Ortiz arrives for a wonderful little scene with Ford, chuckling over his senior officer's predicament and amused by the exchange with Henderson. Ford, frustrated though he is, teases back, about Ortiz trying to bring his old 'blankie' on the last tour, but Ortiz is unabashed and defends his 'blanket' with good humour. He then gets a twinge of anxiety as he asks about bunk assignments, anxious to be able to choose this tour and complaining about his last roommate who kept cutting his toenails and leaving the clippings all over the floor.

Ford's frustration is growing and growing, and as he knows Ortiz well he can sound off about his own various concerns – having to get the boat ready for a parade around the statue of liberty tonight, the boat not being ready, most of the crew wet behind the ears, and Bridger nowhere to be seen. Ortiz is unmoved, sticking to his subject of the creepiness of someone else's toenails and determined to choose his own bunkmate. All of these problems are Ford's problems, not his. I suppose it is an advantage of being enlisted. Ford gives up and sends him to help O'Neill, who is having trouble getting the vid-link to work. Such a great scene – it feels so natural: Ford is perfectly harassed here and the contrast is beautifully done between the awkward new crewmember, Henderson, and the old hand, Ortiz. And Ortiz has new hair for season two: he has let his curls grow out and the new shaggy look really suits him. Yum yum.

Bridger makes his way onto the bridge, which is in darkness. The new design is very snazzy, and he certainly seems to approve. He sees Darwin swimming around outside and calls him in with hand signals. Seconds later Darwin arrives in the bridge moonpool. They agree how good it is to be back, and then Bridger spots a stranger swabbing the desk – it is a GELF. Bridger instantly recognises him as 'an alpha model k'. Note he said 'an', implying that there are more than one. The GELF calls himself a prototype, and says that he can be called 'Dagwood', like a joke, 'Dagwood the Dagger'. Bridger recognises that this is in bad taste, yet doesn't argue the point, and Dagwood's bad-taste name stays.

Actor Peter de Luise doesn't have the character off yet – in this first scene he is far better spoken and less moronic than he will become later in the series. Yet he is clearly very different than the GELFs locked up on their island, which leads me to wonder why they had to be locked up while this one is free to work. How much freedom does he effectively have? How limited is his intelligence? How can they be certain that this limitation makes him safe to roam freely, while the others who have equal strength combined with greater intelligence have to be locked up? Anyway, Bridger welcomes him aboard, but Dagwood points out that he is not staying aboard to sail, but is only to clean. He was designed as 'effective fighting personnel' but didn't work out and now he cleans. Bridger seems very familiar with the story of the GELFs.

On Dagger Island, Brody seems the only one willing to work; Donato has disappeared, and the rest of the guards are slacking off. From the conversation, it seems that Brody (and the other guards) have been here for a long time.

Joseph and another Dagger are about to become parents – on their birthday. Mariah is triumphant, seeing it as proof that they should be free, since Daggers are not supposed to be able to reproduce. I was wondering how they kept the pregnancy secret all those months – the guards are slack, but you'd think they'd have noticed. A guard comes looking for Donato, and is captured by the GELFs – and joins a growing group of captive guards.

Down in the bowels of seaQuest, O'Neill is demonstrating that he can do more than translate and push buttons as he works on the malfunctioning vid-link (it looks more like a turbine or giant fan/air conditioning unit to me, but what do I know?). Ortiz joins him, and O'Neill moans about how unfinished the boat is. Seems he has been at work for a while – did all the officers get dragged back to work long before the enlisted personnel had to report? Anyway, he uses his headset to contact Ford, who is magically on the bridge as though he had been there all along. Continuity is a wonderful thing; what a shame it wasn't used here. O'Neill asks Ortiz for a tool, and then suggests he move the turbine vent. Why is the vid-link hooked up through a turbine vent? The vid-link is still picking up random TV footage.

O'Neill is every bit as harassed and frustrated here as Ford was earlier; just how long have these two been at work? Ortiz, fresh back from leave and without the responsibility for the situation that they have, is annoyingly cheerful (from their perspective, at least), but cute with it. Ford frustratedly but rhetorically asks, 'where's Captain Bridger' – wanting to put some of this frustration onto him – and right on cue Bridger pops up behind him. Ford's immediate reaction is 'where've you been?!' which is a wonderful way to greet your commanding officer. He instantly amends that to a delighted grin and handshake. I like the rapport these two have, but also think he just wants Bridger to shoulder the responsibility for getting a half-finished boat seaworthy by nightfall. Bridger admits he's been sleeping, and that Lucas still is, having had a 'tough summer' (why? What happened?). It's a nice greeting scene between the two of them, as they come across as genuinely fond of one another, catching up in a few words on the summer (it is definitely implied that it has only been a summer away from the boat, so they got it built tremendously quickly).

Ford claims to have taken a course on 'fractal theories of cold fusion' at which Bridger groans and tells him never to change and Ford laughs and replies that he wasn't planning to. Fun stuff. At that moment, the vid-link boots up correctly, and Bridger promptly takes the credit for his mere presence making the equipment work, to Ford's amused chagrin. Bridger says he will be interviewing new officers in the wardroom, at which Ford tells him not to use the toilet as it floods the galley. Another symptom of the dodgy wiring and poor condition of the boat. Bridger tells him not to worry, as it is just a shakedown cruise.

At that moment, the turbine unit that O'Neill and Ortiz are working under collapses. That is O'Neill's fault for telling Ortiz to move it. It should have landed on Ortiz' head from where we last saw him, but he seems to have moved out from under it, and it has landed instead on O'Neill, who is trapped beneath it. Ortiz can't shift it, so Bridger and Ford go rushing to the rescue while all around the bridge random crewpeople stare in horror at the screen. Are these two the closest to the scene? Or is it just that this entire crew they have is incapable of independently thinking to help? The combined efforts of many men can't lift the turbine, but then Dagwood comes along and single-handedly lifts it off O'Neill, who is able to crawl free bruised but safe. Which gives us a practical demonstration of the strength of a Dagger.

Everyone is shocked. "Who's that?" O'Neill wants to know. Dagwood, Ford tells him. A GELF. When did Ford meet Dagwood? "He's a Dagger?" Ortiz asks, at which O'Neill promptly sticks up for his rescuer: "Hey! He saved my life." "I am a Dagger," Dagwood mildly tells them, shaking hands all round. "Can we keep him?" O'Neill wants to know, apparently convinced by his rescue that Dagwood is useful. Bridger says he hopes so, but it is up to Dagwood. I wouldn't have thought so, given what we know of GELFs so far. While the other GELFs are kept under lock and key on a secure island, Dagwood has the freedom to choose for himself where he works? Or does Bridger have enough clout to requisition him? How does the security aspect of this work? "Everything works out in some way," says Dagwood. "It would be good." So that's a yes then?

Meanwhile at the GELF colony, the natives are getting restless. The GELFs stage a bloodless coup, effortlessly taking out all their guards and taking over the place. Up in the control tower, Brody realises what is going on and sends out an alarm – but there is no one left to hear or respond. They call this top security? Brody heads for the escape pod and makes good his escape, clearly frightened by his rebelling prisoners. The GELFs round up their prisoners, and Mariah bears the baby aloft, proclaiming “Our future; our freedom” to a chorus of cheers.

While Brody, floating in his escape pod in the middle of the ocean, wearily repeats his distress call over and over, with no sign of anyone hearing him, back at the GELF colony Mariah is hacking into the computer systems, and – ominously – finding everything she needs to know. She has up a screen of General Thomas of the UEO.

We cut to a correctional facility at UEO HQ. A prisoner is being brought out, mouthing off loudly about food and surfing. This is Tony Piccolo, full of attitude and a broad Brooklyn attitude. Among other things he mentions his father being in the NYPD before taking off with his aunt, but who knows if this is the truth? His guards have clearly heard it all before and, unimpressed, tell him he has a boat to catch.

At the GELF colony, Joseph is advocating peace, now that they have hostages to bargain with and have proved that they can be fathers and mothers. But to Mariah the birth of the child means that everything has changed, and she insists that she will not live like this any longer, an animal in a cage. And Joseph is outvoted.

Back on seaQuest, Bridger is bemused when the new doctor – Wendy Smith – barges into his room, apparently by accident, and starts babbling absolute nonsense about always being in the wrong place, but it turning out to be the right place, yadda yadda. I hate her already. She tells Bridger to use her first name, and when he says not yet, calls him by his first name – which he rightly calls her on, insisting on formal use of his title. She is unperturbed, however, helping herself to a cup of coffee without asking and insulting him further by calling seaQuest a ship instead of a boat.

Then she tells him she is third generation Navy, daughter of Admiral Lexington Fisher Smith. Sexy Lexie, as Bridger knew her – she fired him from his first job. Wendy certainly doesn't act like someone who grew up understanding naval protocols. Or maybe she knows them and doesn't care? Wendy apparently took her residency in psychiatry, telling him her PHd was biophysics. Oh really. "My passion is parapsychology. I can bend keys and spoons. I can read minds." Bridger looks sceptical, so to prove it she tells him: "You're thinking: this girl's as smart and pretty as her mother, but, man, what a mouth" Bridger laughs at this. Don't tell me he actually likes this idiot!

They are interrupted by the buzz of an intercom, and to my delight Ortiz appears on a small screen, and apologises for interrupting. Is he working on communications then? Oh yeah, O'Neill went to medbay to get checked out, didn't he. Except that the doctor isn't there, she's here. "It's not problem", Bridger tells him, but "it might be", Ortiz replies. They have a military police launch requesting permission to board, and their security checks out. Bridger gives permission to board, then tells Smith they'll have to continue this later. She is then rude again. "My mother told me you were a bit pretentious, but I hardly noticed." Way to get the captain on side. And she is now calling him 'captain', but with an air of insolence that should get her into serious trouble if only she had a more authoritarian captain. And she has bent one of his spoons.

Bridger greets the military police, and signs for their prisoner, who is on an early release programme. Bridger is apparently unperturbed about having him dumped aboard, despite not having known about it beforehand. Why seaQuest? Because the prisoner is an experimental. The UEO is placing hardship cases where they can do the most good, says the guard sarcastically, telling Bridger that Piccolo is rough around the edges but has a healthy attitude. Yeah, right. Piccolo admits he was in for striking an officer, and is all brash attitude. Bridger is unimpressed by the macho blustering, but lets him get away with it. Surely the first reaction of the captain of a submarine who has an ex-con on parole foisted aboard should be to instil a bit of discipline in said convict?

Not wanting to be aboard, Piccolo makes a run for it, although where he hopes to run to is anyone's guess. Bridger calls security, who futilely give chase. O'Neill (apparently back on duty now) then locates the fugitive – swimming through the aqua tunnels, without any oxygen. Darwin catches him, and herds him to the moon pool, where he is pulled out by Ford and Bridger and surrenders, somewhat cowed by his encounter with the dolphin. How did Bridger and Ford know to get there so fast? And why are Ortiz and Lucas also hanging around? Not that I mind seeing Ortiz again. Bridger is angry, but not as much as he should be, telling Piccolo that everyone on the boat gets a second chance, but he is pushing it. It turns out Piccolo has gills, which is why he was able to swim underwater without oxygen: he was trying to get out into the ocean and away. "When I was in the can they asked for volunteers, I raised my hand, that's how I got out early," he explains. "I'm a surfer, I figured they might come in handy."

Artificial gills? According to seaQuest's internal history, it was just such controversial experimentation that led, in part at least, to Leslie Ferrina (AKA The Regulator) being drummed out of the scientific community in 2002/3. So, presumably someone must have continued his controversial work after his faked suicide, and gained sufficient credence (and therefore funding) for the experiments to have reached this late stage: working artificial gills being surgically grafted onto live human volunteers. Interesting. What a shame Ferrina's work in this field wasn't at least mentioned in passing here.

Back to the GELF colony, and the GELFs are taking to the boats, heading for UEO HQ – "When you want to slay a dragon, you go straight for its heart," says Mariah, philosophically.

On seaQuest, Lucas has been give Piccolo as a roommate, and is not happy, trying to talk Bridger out of it. He cites Ortiz, who apparently did get to choose his roommate after all. But Bridger is unmoved, telling Lucas he could be a role model and to "make the best of it." Lucas heads for his room, where to his dismay he finds Tony making himself at home, putting up 'babe' posters and rooting through his stuff. Tony promptly dubs Lucas 'Luke', and nabs the top bunk. Lucas looks weary: it is going to be a long tour.

Finally. O'Neill has picked up a distress beacon, but is having trouble pinpointing the location. Ortiz pops up over his shoulder, and they bicker mildly about the wiring. Henderson then pops up and proves able to help solve the problem. She learned a lot from her father the solar station jockey it seems. And she has managed to smuggle Addison aboard, and has him on her console! Ford lets her get away with it, but that stuffed bear is a big sign of the dumbing down of the show. Lonnie's work works, and O'Neill gets the location. Ford gives Ortiz a slap on the shoulder. "Let's go." Huh? Why? Since when is this kind of thing his job? Of course, the responsible element of the crew is drastically reduced since last year. And then from inside the escape pod we hear what sounds like a helicopter. Eh? Ford and Ortiz open the capsule to find Brody drowsing inside. Ortiz looks incredibly cute peering down. Tough guy Brody manages to crack a joke. "Humour under pressure? I'm impressed," says Ford. So Brody introduces himself with another joke.

To be continued …

And judgement is reserved for the second installment.



Jo, March 2004